Wife’s responds to husband’s alleged death threats with ‘I miss you’, court dismisses personal protection order request
A woman who sought a personal protection order against her husband after claiming he sent her messages saying he “fantasised all the time about killing (her)” has had her application dismissed, with the court pointing out that she replied, “I miss you”, to one of the messages.
According to Shin Min Daily news, the couple married on Dec 6, 2023.
On Sept 30, 2024, they were involved in a physical altercation in which the wife assaulted her husband, prompting him to move out the following day. He subsequently obtained a personal protection order against his wife in November that year.
The wife has since applied for a personal protection order and eviction order.
She claimed that between Dec 29, 2024, and Jan 20, 2025, her husband sent her harassing and threatening messages via Telegram. Among the messages were:
- Dec 29, 2024: Her husband said that during the days they were apart, he had ”fantasised all the time about killing (her)”. He added that he had even searched online for ways to choke someone so that he could restrain his wife if she lost control.
- Jan 1, 2025: He said that after resuming frequent interactions with his wife, “the thoughts of wanting to kill (her) have come back”.
- Jan 5, 2025: He told his wife that since the incident on Sep 30, 2024, she had become his “biggest enemy”. He added that he would keep his plans from her and would not give her another chance to interfere with his “escape”.
- Jan 20, 2025: He asked: “You think I’m abusing you? So you can do horrible things to me, but you can’t accept me fighting back?”
The wife also alleged that her husband had injured her arm during an argument in May or June 2024.
Husband said he wanted to kill her — she replied, ‘I miss you’
Despite the alleged threats, the wife repeatedly sent messages expressing affection, invited her husband to take photos together and even asked him for intimate photos.
According to the court documents, after receiving the message in which her husband said he “fantasised” about killing her, the wife replied: “I miss you.”
She also asked to speak to him on the phone before bed and said she wanted to “hug” him, before sending him a photo of herself at a ballet class.
After receiving the message that his thoughts of killing her had returned, the wife suggested that they attend marital counselling. She also proposed interacting twice a day, keeping a shared online diary and asked her husband for intimate photos.
She also told him: “As a husband, you have a responsibility to support me.”
In response to her husband calling her his “biggest enemy”, she clarified that she had suggested that he move out as an attempt to “test the waters”. She reiterated that she still loved him.
Wife initiated contact
In considering the wife personal protection order application, the judge said the wife had to show that her husband’s conduct had caused her to suffer the effects of psychological or emotional abuse. However, based on their conversations, the judge found that the wife appeared more intent on communicating with and becoming closer to her husband.
In fact, the judge noted that after the woman’s husband moved out, he had blocked his wife, and it was the wife who initiated contact with him.
The judge eventually found that the wife’s response to the alleged threats was inconsistent with that of a victim who was genuinely fearful or being subjected to abuse.
As for the wife’s allegation that her husband had assaulted her, the judge accepted his account that she had approached and struck him while agitated.
The husband had hit her arm while defending himself, the judge found, and no injuries were sustained.
Judge: No need for protection order as husband does not want contact
The judge noted that the husband had made it clear that he did not want further contact with his wife, and therefore there was no need to issue a protection order.
The couple had been living apart and had not seen each other since Oct 1, 2024. They had also stopped communicating around Jan 20, 2025.
As the risk of future domestic violence was deemed to be extremely low, the woman’s applications for a personal protection order and eviction order were dismissed, and she was ordered to pay $1,500 in legal costs.
See something interesting? Contribute your story to us.
