Australia-based S'porean teen with autism and ADHD says she can't live in S'pore again
An Australia-based Singaporean teenager with autism and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) said she can no longer live in Singapore, eliciting predictably indignant — as well as encouraging — responses from netizens.
"I will always be proud to call myself Singaporean," said @ahlianlia in a TikTok clip posted on Dec 6, wryly noting that "you don't appreciate a clean toilet until you leave".
The 19-year-old admitted that while there are many "things about me that are very Singaporean", such as her accent and the way she continually presses the button at traffic lights, the pressure to succeed and her neurodivergence make it untenable for her to live here.
"I'm an insatiable bitch with a s***-ton of anxiety now," she declared. And while she thinks the Republic could still be a great place to live, "it's just not for me anymore".
Pressured in school and at home
The teen asserted: "Singapore is an elitist and classist machine. If you're rich, academically elite, and play by the rules, you'll be rewarded. If you're different without the money to fit in, you'll fall between the cracks."
She lamented how her parents "emptied their pockets because they were so scared their kids were different and left behind", and that she now has a complicated relationship with her mother.
Since the age of three, her whole life revolved around "tuition, piano, ballet and swimming" from 7am to 8pm each day, and she was "caned almost every day since the age of six".
She even nearly had a "full blown mental breakdown" when she received her PSLE results, "hyperventilating in front of the entire class".
"No 11-year-old should be reacting to exam results like that," she added.
"I feel like Singaporean pressure has made me so anxious to the point that I can't feel fulfilled with anything I do. My brain is just built different, and I can't race and chase the way Singapore pressures Singaporeans to."
The clip has since garnered at least 71,300 views, 5,156 reactions and 389 comments.
ahlialia's sentiments resonated with some TikTokers.
"I can relate to that. Even now I feel the stress from some people here and the looking for jobs stress and family stress," said one user.
"The weight of family expectations and social pressure in singapore is very real, and for someone who is neurodivergent, it can feel even more overwhelming," said another.
Others tried to be encouraging, with one noting that there is no perfect country. "As long as you find happiness in your chosen country just go with your heart. At different stage of life, our thinking will change," said a TikToker.
'This has nothing to do with Singpore'
The post was also shared on Reddit, where some said the issue was not with Singapore, but parenting. "Sorry, this has nothing to do with Singapore and everything to do with her parents forcing her to do stuff," said one.
"Kudos to her for recognizing and accepting that her own parents were part of the problem," said another.
Others felt she was spoiled. "Her TikTok page reeks of entitlement," said a Redditor.
"Stop whining," said another. "Learn something, explore something ... Life is never fair."
