Widowed at 48, woman turns husband’s ashes into diamond necklace so ‘there’s always a part of him’ on her

At just 48 years old, Singaporean Olivia Ing found herself widowed after losing her husband of 24 years to heart failure.

Now, almost two years on, the loss remains raw, and she continues to grapple with the daily adjustment of living without the person she had spent half of her life with.

What has brought Ing comfort in her grief, however, is a piece of memorial jewellery created using her husband’s ashes. Around her neck hangs a heart-shaped diamond necklace, made from his ashes and strands of her own hair, which she described as “an embodiment of all (their) time together”.

Death an ‘abstract’ topic they often discussed

Reflecting on the “devastating” first few months after her husband’s death, Ing, now 50, said she spent much of it in shock, trying not to cry constantly and feeling as though she was “not really functioning properly”.

“For the whole first year, the reality of (his death) had not hit,” she told Stomp, wiping away tears.

They spent 29 years together, having met at university before marrying in 2000, she said, describing them as “inseparable”. 

She also found herself searching for ways to keep his presence close, seeking comfort in things that made it feel as though he was still around.

The couple, both writers who had worked together for two decades and did not have children, often discussed “abstract” topics such as death. As a result, Ing had already known that memorial jewellery would likely be part of the plan.

Years earlier, they had come across the concept of turning ashes into diamonds. While Ing acknowledged that some Asians might consider it “pantang” (superstitious), both she and her husband were intrigued by the idea.

After discovering a local brand specialising in the niche technology, she set aside a portion of her husband’s ashes before the rest were placed at the columbarium.

She later worked with Together Diamonds to transform the ashes into several pieces of memorial jewellery, including the heart-shaped diamond necklace she now wears almost every day.

“There’s always a part of him on me,” she said.

In total, she has created four necklaces, including three stainless steel chains with pendants — four rings, a cross necklace for her husband’s parents and a pair of earrings, all containing his ashes.

She described the jewellery as a way of keeping a physical part of him with her at all times — a “talisman” that brings comfort and a sense of safety, and a guardian angel that helps ease her anxiety.

“Even if it’s a quick trip down to the kopitiam, I will have something on me,” she said.

A symbol of life lived and lost

The memorial diamond brings her “immense comfort” and is, in her words, the “perfect accessory”.

At the same time, wearing it can feel “heavy”, she said, because of what it symbolises, what it contains and “how the gem itself came to be” — evoking a complex mix of emotions, from profound heartache and grief to moments of love and happiness.

Ing shared that her husband had a genetic heart condition and had lived with a stent in his heart for seven years. In 2024, what he initially thought was asthma turned out to be heart failure during a medical check-up, leading to him undergoing bypass surgery at Mount Elizabeth Hospital.

Although he appeared to be recovering well immediately after the operation, he passed away on Sept 24, 2024, just days before he was due to be discharged — merely two months shy of his 51st birthday and right after their 29th anniversary.

“I’d rather have him back than have all the jewellery in the world,” she said. 

Despite the emotions it carries, Ing said the heart-shaped diamond was the “perfect choice”, as it rests close to her heart.

While memorial jewellery is a less conventional choice than keeping ashes after cremation, which remains the norm in Singapore, she said she felt that Together Diamonds’ “respectful process” was the right fit for her.

“I think he’d be very happy to see the jewellery,” Ing said, adding that the heart-shaped design felt especially fitting because her husband “loved love” and was a deeply sentimental person.

An intricate process now growing in popularity

Together Diamonds, launched in 2025 as Singapore’s first homegrown service that transforms hair, fur and ashes into memorial diamonds, was founded by Andrew Lim. 

What inspired him to start the business — along with Apart.sg, his other brand that transforms similar materials into keepsake jewellery — was his father’s health scare, which prompted him to create a way to keep a part of him close at all times.

Initial demand in Singapore was modest, but Lim said it has grown faster than expected, as more people come to understand the emotional meaning behind the jewellery. He shares that memorial diamonds, each with a price tag starting from $1,588, offer a more permanent and symbolic way of preserving a loved one’s memory.

Lim explained that turning ashes and hair into jewellery starts with carefully extracting carbon from such materials and purifying it in a laboratory. It is then subjected to a process that replicates how natural diamonds form deep underground, using high pressure and temperature over time.

The entire process takes about three months.

The handover of the jewellery, he said, is one of the moments he will “never get used to”. He noted that some clients cry immediately, others fall silent, while some “smile in a way that feels almost peaceful – like they finally have a part of someone back with them again.”

Lim also shared an example of a family who combined their hair into a single piece of jewellery, symbolising that they would remain together. 

While he understands why people may feel uneasy about the idea of turning human remains into jewellery, he said it is moments like these that remind him that “every piece carries an entire lifetime of meaning behind it”.

Grieving a spouse very much a ‘solo journey’

Since experiencing the loss of her husband 20 months ago, Ing says her life will never be the same, and she is still uncertain about what the future will look like without him.

While she is grateful for the tremendous support she received from her loved ones, she said one thing she had not realised as a young widow was how little time bereaved spouses are often given to make major decisions in the immediate aftermath of a loved one’s death.

She noted that her husband died on a Saturday night, and less than 12 hours later, she was at the funeral home having to make decisions such as choosing an urn.

Ing kept the urn containing her husband’s ashes at home for two months while searching for what she felt was the right final resting place for him.

She eventually chose Woodlands Columbarium, which she visited every few days in the first year after his death. While she visits less frequently now — in a bid to better emotionally regulate herself – she still writes letters to him, and decorates the space often with miniatures of his favourite food and items.

During that initial period, she was also trying to adjust to being “completely alone” in everyday activities that they once shared, from eating meals and grocery shopping to simply going to sleep at night.

While the memorial jewellery she wears has been admired by many people, Ms Ing said grief and coping mechanisms are deeply personal. For her, the jewellery was a way of “staving off reality”, adding that grieving the loss of a spouse is “very much a solo journey”.

“Honestly, losing hope and wanting to give it all up was an occurrence every few hours,” she said. But what continues to keep her going is her determination to honour the way her husband loved and cared for her throughout their entire relationship.

Even during the final three weeks they spent in the hospital, she said her husband’s main concern remained her wellbeing.

“So however much I wanted to give up, I felt like I had to at least try my best to keep going, for however long I could,” she said.

Looking back, Ing said it had all come together in a bittersweet way. September has become both a joyful and painful month for her – it was the month she met her husband, married him and ultimately lost him.

The timing of the diamond necklace also felt significant, as it was completed just before his first death anniversary in September 2025.

In a way, she said, it was “perfect”.

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