My boyfriend cheated on me with my friend months after I gave birth: Ex-SQ stewardess turned fishmonger on rebuilding her life

Think Singapore is just a nation of people working typical corporate jobs? Introducing Stomp’s new original series, Don’t Try This At Work, where we spotlight individuals with risky, exciting, unconventional and even downright terrifying jobs.

From cleaning up after death to handling bees by hand, the series offers a behind-the-scenes look at occupations most people would never dare to try — and the people who do them every single day.

With just $300 left in her business account and a newborn daughter to care for, Amber Tan was facing financial ruin and heartbreak.

The 35-year-old former Singapore Airlines (SQ) flight attendant had left the airline to pursue freelance work before being convinced by her then-boyfriend to start a seafood business under her name.

She poured thousands of dollars into the venture, only for it to struggle while he repeatedly cheated on her with one of her good friends — just months after she gave birth to their daughter.

Today, with her daughter turning two and the business back on its feet, Tan told Stomp she is proud of her resilience and having the courage to walk away from an abusive relationship.

Poured $350k into business and ex-boyfriend’s debts

Shortly after they began dating in September 2022, Tan’s then-boyfriend, whom she met through a money game scheme — a type of get-rich-quick programme — persuaded her to start a business under her name.

He presented himself as an experienced businessman and claimed to own a business in Johor, Malaysia. Without probing further, she believed him.

Having left her job as a flight attendant, she was taking on event jobs and photoshoots to make ends meet. Hoping for a more stable career, Tan agreed to his proposition and started Pao Ge Seafood, a seafood wholesaler with a stall at Jurong Fishery Port.

However, she said the business struggled from the outset. She quickly realised she was the one handling everything and trying to keep operations running.

“I was the one doing the accounts, calculations and analysing all the problems,” Tan said, adding that he would often dismiss her concerns, yet fail to come up with solutions.

She invested $170,000 of her savings in the business, while her ex-boyfriend put in about $60,000. But as he fell behind on supplier payments and struggled to support operations, much of the responsibility fell on her shoulders.

She also forked out an additional $180,000 to pay off his gambling debts. In total, Tan estimates she spent around $350,000 on the business and her former partner, wiping out nearly all her savings and leaving her with “nothing much to fall back on”.

Infidelity, ‘friends trip’ with the third party

After discovering she was pregnant in December 2023, Tan scaled back her time at the fishery port and entrusted the business to her partner — but the business continued to bleed money.

On June 28, 2024, she gave birth to their daughter. Just five months later, she discovered that her ex-partner had been having an affair with one of her good friends.

“The baby just born and they decided to cheat,” Tan said, noting that her friend was fully aware of her situation.

Despite the betrayal, Tan initially chose to forgive him for their daughter’s sake, not wanting her to grow up without a father figure.

At the same time, she was struggling with postpartum depression.

The situation worsened when she later went on a trip to Hong Kong with a group of friends that included both her ex-boyfriend and the other woman.

Only afterwards did she realise they were still involved with each other.

After uncovering more text message exchanges between the pair — for the fourth time — in September 2025, Tan said she knew she had to leave him for good.

Tan added that she was already shouldering most of the childcare responsibilities and expenses.

“I knew that it was the right thing to do for (my daughter),” said Tan. “She will not blame me for being a single mum, but she may blame me for staying with someone who brought us pain.”

“I’ve never looked back since,” she said.

After ending the relationship, Tan cut her ex-boyfriend out of the business, took full control of operations and worked to clear the debts owed to suppliers.

She even injected another $10,000 of her remaining savings to keep the business afloat and had to let go of her only worker in December 2025. During this time, Tan began learning every aspect of the trade herself.

By February this year, Tan had grown the business to break even, all while managing a warehouse in Johor Bahru, creating social media content and raising her young daughter.

“I learned a lot during that period — about trust, business techniques and survival,” she said.

Sports bra and shorts a practical ‘uniform’ on the job

As Tan spent more time working at Jurong Fishery Port, she found herself entering a world dominated by men.

In the beginning, she said everyone would watch her at work and judge her. Some pointed fingers and mocked her. 

Online, she often receives online comments about the sports bra and shorts she wears at the port.

“I know it seems provocative,” she told Stomp, adding that she used to wear T-shirts and long pants but found that they would get wet, cling to her skin and trap heat, causing the ‘fishy smell’ to linger.

A visit by Stomp found that the warehouse had little ventilation. Many of the male fishmongers worked with rolled-up sleeves, while some were shirtless.

“Anyway, the uncles here don’t care about what I wear, they only care about the quality of the fish,” Tan said with a laugh.

Over time, many of the fishmongers learnt about her circumstances and began giving her “little encouragements in Hokkien”, such as, “You can do it, you are so brave”, along with advice on selecting fish.

Still learning how to cut fish properly, she also receives help from nearby stallholders at the port, who try to teach her along the way.

“Those moments mean so much to me,” she said.

‘I hope my baby will be proud of me one day’

Looking back, Tan described her daughter as a “gift”. She said her child was very much planned, as she had always dreamed of settling down and starting a family. At 32, she made the decision that she wanted to have a child before it was too late.

During the three years she spent with her former partner, however, Tan said she often found herself at rock bottom, especially after realising she would never recover the money she had lost.

At one point, she even contemplated taking her own life.

“But my baby gave me a reason to be strong. I knew then, I cannot let her pay for my mistakes,” she said.

Tan recalled spending many nights during her pregnancy crying quietly and gently patting her belly, apologising to her unborn daughter and promising to give her the life she deserved.

Becoming a mother, she shared, gave her a renewed sense of purpose. It motivated her to leave her unhealthy relationship, rebuild her business and create a better future for her child.

Tan said she once thought romantic love was everything.

But after losing her savings, enduring a lonely pregnancy and being repeatedly cheated on, she no longer wanted her daughter to grow up thinking it was acceptable to stay with a man who treated her that way.

Wiping away tears, she added: “I want her to know that I was brave and strong for her. I hope my baby will be proud of me one day.”

Bouncing back stronger

Today, Tan's days begin at 8am with her daughter.

She spends her daytime hours handling administrative work, cooking and caring for her child before heading to the fishery port at around 11pm several times a week.

There, she sells leftover fish and waits for fishing boats carrying fresh catches to arrive at around 2.30am — a routine that often stretches into the early hours of the morning and ends only at about 4am.

In between, she also fulfills online orders and makes deliveries to her regular customers.

On days like these, Tan goes more than 24 hours without sleep. 

Still, she said it is all worth it. Now that her business is growing and has begun generating modest profits, she believes it is “only the beginning”.

“That’s enough reason to keep me going,” she said.

Looking back, Tan feels everything she has done and endured has ultimately led her to a better place.

“I want to show people that being a single mother does not hold me back,” she said.

“At the end of the day, I didn’t beg, borrow or steal — I earned my money with my own bare hands,” she added with a smile.

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