‘I was glad my last pregnancy was lost’: After 5 miscarriages and cancer diagnosis, S’porean woman gives birth to twins
After enduring five miscarriages and eight in vitro fertilisation (IVF) cycles over 14 years of trying to conceive, one particular loss changed everything for one Singaporean woman – though not in the way most would expect.
Looking back today, 41-year-old Josephine Foong said she is “glad” her last pregnancy did not go through, as she was diagnosed with stage two breast cancer shortly after the miscarriage in 2020.
Ms Foong, an administrative executive, told Stomp that it was “shocking” to receive the diagnosis in 2021 and learn that the cancer was hereditary, despite having no known family history of the disease.
She had just gone through her fourth – and longest – pregnancy, which she ultimately lost at nine weeks.
“I was glad that my last pregnancy was lost as I wouldn’t have known how to take care of kids if I were to have them at the time while going through cancer treatment,” said Ms Foong.
Pushing through 14 challenging years
After tying the knot 17 years ago, the couple began trying for a child on their third year, but struggled to conceive.
It was only in 2012 that Ms Foong discovered she had polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), a hormonal disorder that can affect fertility — and likely the source of her fertility struggles.
The couple decided to begin IVF treatment after being on fertility medication. They eventually went through eight cycles of intra-uterine insemination while facing numerous setbacks, including five miscarriages — the first on April 1, 2015, a date they said they will “never forget”.
“Each loss felt like a failure,” Ms Foong said, adding that it often felt as though they had done something wrong or missed something they could have done differently. “It was emotionally hard to bear.”
The miscarriages were the most challenging part of the journey for the couple, as they struggled to understand what went wrong and how to break the cycle.
After every miscarriage, Ms Foong said she wanted to give up, but her medical team would continue coming up with new plans for them to try again — something she said kept her going.
She described her husband, Winston Yip, 42, as “super supportive”, saying his love, care and constant presence gave her confidence in herself and reassurance that he would take care of both her and their children in the future.
‘There was nothing I could do other than being present’
“Seeing Jo going for the jabs and scans for each retrieval really pains me because it causes bruises and blood clots,” the IT manager shared with Stomp, adding that what hurt him even more was watching his wife break down for weeks after each miscarriage and feeling helpless.
“There was nothing I could do other than being present, making sure she is well fed and letting her express her emotions,” he said.
When Ms Foong first discovered a lump on her breast some time after the fourth pregnancy, Mr Yip said he tried to remain optimistic, assuring her it might be nothing serious.
Things took a turn when doctors confirmed it was cancer, and he quickly went into action mode – arranging logistics, identifying next steps, deciding on treatments, choosing doctors and learning about post-operation care.
For the next three years, the couple stopped the IVF procedures as their lives became consumed by medical appointments and treatments.
Road to recovery
Ms Foong began chemotherapy and underwent surgery in 2021. Mr Yip said he broke down when the doctor confirmed the operation was successful. “I could have lost her in the operation,” adding that his only focus throughout was on his wife.
Beyond supporting each other, Ms Foong said her medical team – whom she described as “amazing” – played a major role in helping her navigate cancer treatment while still holding on to her hopes of becoming a mother.
Her fertility doctor even visited her in the hospital after her cancer surgery, and reassured her that they would continue supporting her whenever she was ready to return to family planning.
Looking back, Ms Foong described the cancer diagnosis as seeing “light through the hurt”, saying it ultimately turned out to be a blessing.
The couple resumed IVF in 2024 after receiving the green light from her oncologist.
They were down to their last two frozen embryos and seventh IVF attempt, deciding they would stop trying for good if it did not succeed. The first IVF cycle after her cancer treatment was unsuccessful.
Little did they know, their eighth attempt would finally be the one that worked.
Relationship ‘more important than having babies’
Today, the couple are parents to twin daughters Annette and Anya, born on March 2. Cradling their daughters on April 30 – their official 40-week due date, as the twins were born prematurely at 31 weeks – the couple reflected on a long and painful journey that they said was ultimately worthwhile.
In fact, Ms Foong quipped that she initially did not want children, but seeing how much her husband loved being around them inspired her to “do something so he could experience fatherhood” – while her own desire to become a mother also grew over the years.
“I always thank her for willingly going through the whole process again and again,” Mr Yip said, pointing out that women are the ones who do the heavy lifting and bear most of the pain.
To him, marriage is like “going on a road trip in a camper van together”, where there are bound to be blind spots along the way and one person has to “take the wheel” while the other supports.
There were times during the journey when the couple were unsure if they wanted to continue, as the process was far from easy. Still, Ms Foong said the relationship between husband and wife is ultimately “more important than having babies”.
Now with two infants, their lives have become “crazy”, as Ms Foong put it, but also a life-changing and precious reminder that their daughters are here because of the support they received from each other and their loved ones.
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